Thoughts from Chickadee

Five years ago I wrote an article for a website one of my friends created to publish new and interesting writing by women and for women. This particular article was my personal reflection on sexuality and identity, and it was one of the best received articles on the site (which unfortunately has since shut down). In celebration of Pride month, I decided to revisit this piece and take a look at how my thoughts and experiences have changed. First, the original piece.   Photo by Sharon McCutcheon from Pexels                                                                                                                        ...

 I'm a big fan of research when in the early stages of a decision.  I like pro and con lists, reading reviews, reading about alternative options, and letting myself nap on the decision (I've found naps generally improve things, whether I'm in a bad mood or trying to make a choice). When it came to choosing a dating site when I decided I was ready to get serious about finding a partner, I did what I do best and went into research mode. Over the course of a few weeks, I looked into four dating sites/apps: eHarmony, Tinder, Match.com, and Hinge. While all four have free options, I decided I am willing to pay for a subscription if it is reasonably priced (meaning under $20 a month) and has worthwhile features. 1. eHarmony While eHarmony boasts that every 14 minutes a couple finds love through their site, they also are easily the most expensive dating app I researched. As of summer 2021, depending on which level of premium membership chosen, a membership can cost anywhere from $...

For years, I thought yoga was my type of exercise. It was low impact, soothing, and something that allowed me to check in with my body and mind. I would do it on and off throughout my early 20s when I felt I needed to be more active. Recently, I decided I wanted to actually exercise regularly again and lose some of the weight I gained during the pandemic when I was sitting in a home office all day. To my surprise, I could NOT motivate myself to do yoga. Even when scrolling through my favorite yoga YouTube channel, none of the videos looked fun or interesting.  On a whim I clicked on a HIIT dance workout video YouTube recommended. By the end of 20 minutes I was drenched in sweat, exhausted, completely out of breath, thinking I probably should have used my inhaler, and exhilarated. I started doing dance workouts every evening, and had an incredible amount of fun even when I struggled to get the steps right (grapevines are hard, okay?).  I've spent so much time over the last yea...

While talking with my mom recently about my plan to make dating a priority, she smiled at me and said "It really does sound like you're ready for a relationship!" What was it that prompted this statement? Was it a long explanation of how I have moved past the desire for a fairy-tale perfect romance and recognize the inability of any relationship to live up to that kind of pressure? Was it the five years of work I have done in order to be comfortable in my skin and ready to share myself with another person? Was it my ability to make the world's best chocolate cake? No. It was the story of a few months ago when I had to go to a mechanic to have my brake pads replaced. I made an appointment for the end of the day, thinking I would wait in the shop and read a book while they did the work and then I'd drive the car home in under an hour.  Ha. Ha ha. Instead I was told they would have to keep the car overnight for the work. Since I only have the one car and no one to dr...

I'll try to keep posts as focused on a similar theme as possible, but some weeks I may include a recipe, a book, movie, or TV show review, or a memory that has been on my mind. I will always do my best to loop back to the overall theme of this blog- relationships, dating, and how I navigate the mess of life.  As of the start of this blog, I plan to post weekly on Saturday mornings. However, life happens, and I may sometimes miss a week.  Happy reading!